I got my fresh start in the Flathead Valley over a year ago now. I moved here in late December of 2010, exhausted, depleted, disheartened, sad, and lonely. Since then, so many wonderful things have happened. I returned to my writing roots (which I had had almost no time to devote to during my time in ministry). I started my blog. I started doing some copywriting and copyediting. I got to stay home with my daughter and enjoy making countless wonderful memories with her. I made friends--wonderful, honest, authentic, welcoming, caring, Jesus-centered friends. I had great opportunities to use my spiritual gift of teaching through MOPS and Bible studies at church. I got to connect with members of my church who are just as excited about Jesus' mission on earth as I am and brainstorm ways to live that mission out. I got to enjoy the beauty of this area--snow-covered mountains and tamaracks and sparkling lakes. I felt myself coming alive again. I started to heal from some hurts of the past.
But it's amazing how a person starts to get used to God's blessings. I think that I do this with my husband as well. I so easily forget how lonely I was as a single person, how I prayed on my knees with tears, asking God to send me a husband. I so easily forget worrying that I would die alone. I so easily forget wondering if I was destined to be single forever. And now I have a tremendously wonderful husband, who consistently shows me God's love, who is compassionate and kind, who helps me in so many ways around the house, who listens to me without judgment, who understands me better than perhaps anyone...and I easily forget how that is not a normal thing. That this is a given thing. That this is a gift. I so easily pass him by and think he gives me my due. But in truth, he gives me much more than I deserve. I pass him by so often like a woman who's gotten used to living by the Grand Canyon.
I get used to God's other blessings too. God wants me to stop, pay attention, and remember what tremendous gifts He has given me in my life. Rather than get annoyed with the ways my daughter gets in the way of my plans, God wants me to stop and contemplate the mystery that is an entire human being that one day was not and then one day was. God wants me to be reverent and joyful and watch as He continues to fashion her, His masterpiece. I am on the cusp of the flower unfolding.
I have my husband, my daughter, Montana, my friends. There was a time when I did not have any of these things. I am thankful. I am thankful for what I have been given.
"When the LORD your God brings you into the land he swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to give you--a land with large, flourishing cities you did not build, houses filled with all kinds of good things you did not provide, wells you did not dig, and vineyards and olive groves you did not plant--then when you eat and are satisfied, be careful that you do not forget the LORD, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery."--Deuteronomy 6:10-12 (NIV)